See You Again

I'm walking alone
On the hot sidewalk.
Window shopping.
Food smelling.
Blue bucket hat.
Fake orange chucks.
Shiny cigarette boxes
Call from orange trash bins.
I don't step on the lines,
The game we play at home,
So I run on my toe-tips.
And just like any other day,
I end up on a lone swing,
It's my thinking spot.
You are my safe haven,
I love you.

And it always goes like this,
350 days with my eyes closed
350 days with my voice down
I have to be whatever may pass
I have settled for the role of a clown.

I then get to be me.
I then get to be me.
The secret shared by you and me.

And then there's no more you for me.

8305 days with my eyelids glued.
8305 days with my lips sewn together.
I grew up and learned to hide things.
I became taller, smaller, fatter, thinner,
Smarter, dumber, older, stranger,
A crier, a liar, a trier, a betrayer,
A lover, a hater, a fighter, a loser.
What a way to go from that bald tire.
What a way to put up every single fire.
What a way to supposedly aim higher.
What a way to build a high barrier.
I had to be whatever seemed right.
I had lived with a well-hidden frown,
Pretending that I had never known you.
I thought it a price for having grown.

And it took me long, but I had had enough of it.

Hello!
Good morning.
I see you.
Do you see me?

Hello!
Do you remember me?
I loved you.
Did you love me?

This smile has now resurfaced on my face,
And I throw it at every pair of eyes I see.
In a semi-trance,
I cannot make a single step,
I lay me down to sleep,
But all I wanted to do was dance.
For a couple of hours,
It still feels like a dream,
And then I am awake again,
And people are not disappearing,
And the pictures are not morphing,
As it was always the case in dreams.
I could walk around with a blindfold,
As if I had never been away.
Sitting in the shade, walking in the sun,
Conquering the hills on old rusty bike,
What I used to like is what I still like.
Being adult does not mean losing you,
Wish I had known before that it never did.

I'm walking alone
On the hot sidewalk,
A new bucket hat,
A real pair of Chucks.
Shops mostly closed.
I walk up that street.
"Paradise" plays nearby,
Appropriate music to my ears.
I just passed by the place where
An ice cream truck used to stop by at night.
And I walk, I swim, I cycle, I skip-a-long,
Up the hill and down to the shore,
Where the little river meets the sea.

You were
That missing
Piece of me,
Isn't that ironic,
To have been
A part of
A puzzle,
Apart,
Again?

I see!
See heaven,
See hell,
See life,
See death,
See love,
See pain,
See you,
Again!

- February 04th, August 24th, September 04th and 20th, November 27th and 28th, December 01st, 2016.


and-i-mean-it

Originally titled "350 Days", had only two verses, never went anywhere.

Merged with fragments named "Alone" (the very beginning and the very end) - February 10th, September 12th, 2016 and "See" - September 20th, 2016.

The two last lines, as well as the 350 part repeating a couple of times were removed on December 01st, for more punch.

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